With all the stress, and all the
serious conversations I've had to have in the last 3 weeks, I thought
I would lighten it up a bit. Here are thirty one things to think about! Hope at
least one makes you smile! :)
1. I think part of
a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you
die.
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.
5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
6. Was learning cursive really necessary?
7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
8. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
9. Bad decisions make good stories.
10. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
11. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.
12. "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this - ever.
13. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring, but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voice mail. What did you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?
14. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
15. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.
16. Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I first saw it.
17. I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.
18. The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying to finish a text.
19. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
20. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?
21. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!
22. Shirts get dirty. Underwear get dirty. Jeans? Jeans never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.
23. Sometimes I'll look down at my phone 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
24. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'll bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time!
25. My GPS says "Estimated Arrival Time." I see "Time to Beat."
26. Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart", all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart".
27. My keyboard needs a removable crumb tray like my toaster.
28. What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each other?
29. I wish it were appropriate to say to a complete stranger, "Excuse me, would you like me to show you how to discipline your child?"
30. I never understood why the Lions and Cowboys always get to play on Thanksgiving. Shouldn't the Patriots play the Redskins, and then steal their stadium afterwords?
31. Double-Stuffed Oreos should just be called Oreos, and regular Oreos should be called Diet Oreos.
2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.
5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
6. Was learning cursive really necessary?
7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
8. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
9. Bad decisions make good stories.
10. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
11. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.
12. "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this - ever.
13. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring, but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voice mail. What did you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?
14. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
15. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.
16. Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I first saw it.
17. I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.
18. The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying to finish a text.
19. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
20. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?
21. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!
22. Shirts get dirty. Underwear get dirty. Jeans? Jeans never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.
23. Sometimes I'll look down at my phone 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
24. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'll bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time!
25. My GPS says "Estimated Arrival Time." I see "Time to Beat."
26. Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart", all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart".
27. My keyboard needs a removable crumb tray like my toaster.
28. What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each other?
29. I wish it were appropriate to say to a complete stranger, "Excuse me, would you like me to show you how to discipline your child?"
30. I never understood why the Lions and Cowboys always get to play on Thanksgiving. Shouldn't the Patriots play the Redskins, and then steal their stadium afterwords?
31. Double-Stuffed Oreos should just be called Oreos, and regular Oreos should be called Diet Oreos.
Liz
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